Roadway Express

Librarians, proceed with caution. This story hurts.

When it comes to furniture, I geek out over a peculiar object of desire: I yearn for a card catalog cabinet. Yes, the big old cabinets you used to be able to find at every public library before computers took over—solid, blonde-wood construction, with a kajillion little drawers that are perfect for storing CDs and gewgaws and whatnots and all manner of small household items. I want one. And my sister, bless her, actually found me one of these beauties at Harvard University's music library.

It was absolutely beautiful. Five feet tall, four and a half feet wide, natural oak. Despite its age, it was also in like-new condition, with a few minor nicks near the base of the cabinet. I begged her to get it for me, and to ship it cross-country to Oregon where I live. The only problem was the cost. An empty solid wood cabinet weighs about a hundred pounds; that's hardly a job for FedEx. So my sister lovingly packaged up the cabinet and called Roadway Express for pickup.

This morning, nearly three weeks later, Roadway Express called to let me know that my shipment was "damaged in transit." I went to inspect it this afternoon. I'm not sure entirely what happened—maybe Roadway Express placed the cabinet in a container with three tons of loose cannonballs; maybe it was just shipped with a band of angry male gorillas. All I know is that when it left Cambridge, the catalog cabinet was a solid, gorgeous piece of antique library furniture; by the time it arrived here, it was a mangled, smashed wreck suitable only for kindling.

That's really all you need to know about Roadway Express. I have yet to discover whether the company will reimburse my sister for shipment costs and for the actual value of the catalog cabinet it destroyed, so this review may yet be downgraded to Boat Anchor. Watch this space.

And if you share my love of card catalogs, mourn with me.

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